Wednesday, December 20, 2006

Three Fashion Notes

1. The Emperor's New Clothes, or: What Fashion Blogs Are For:
I can't believe I'm not only one around who sports eyes. Case in point is pages 74-75 of InStyle's January issue. Here we have five gorgeous actresses wearing one-shoulder gowns. Out of the five, only Penelope Cruz's well constructed Azzaro dress is flattering and showing her lovely figure. Rose McGowan's Blumarine dress could have been better had only it was made out of a different fabric. The yellow satin stretches awkwardly on her chest and isn't doing her any favors. But, at least, the color and the cut are very nice.

The other three are nothing short of horrible: Drew Barrymore in a black shapeless DVF that could have been worn by a 7 months pregnant woman. Kristin Davis in an icy blue Alberta Ferreti that makes her balloon from the waist down. And, the worst of all, Beyonce in an Armani Prive atrocity that makes her look like a cartoon version of herself, all booty and not much else.

What annoys me, is that these dresses were chosen by the fashion editor as good examples. We all know that the magazines can't really call the designers out , because, hello? advertising? But they can, at least, be a bit more discriminating with their choices of best looks.

2. This is Why it's so hard to find a decent dress lately:I just read this post by the Bag Snob. She's talking about a specific dress, but this comment is exactly what's wrong with so many of the items you'd find in stores everywhere:
"...Those of you lucky enough to be heading to warm weather this holiday need to grab one of these easy to pack dresses. It is flattering on everyone, the high waist is also perfect to wear as a maternity dress."
I'm sorry, but no. A dress that might as well be maternity-wear is definitely not flattering on everyone, especially not on those among us who are not pregnant and don't want to be mistaken for being so. Can we please have well-structured clothes back? I have a figure to show.

3. Why this back to the 80s thing wasn't such a good idea after all:
It was bound to happen. Once women started buying into this oversized sweaters with cropped leggings look it was only a matter of time before the worst of the 80s would come back: stirrup pants (or tights or whatever you wish to call them). They're here, complete with the saggy knee after the second time you wear them and the whole unkempt air they give.
Trinny, Susannah, Stacy and Clinton have devoted years of tough love to convince women (who are mostly my age and older) to give up this very look of a frumpy sweater over a way too tight pair of elastic pant. They've nearly succeeded in banishing it from our malls and streets and now it's back. Things are going to get very ugly.

Photo by Roxana Lowitt

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